Raw Dawg Pimpin':Psalms of a Stone-Cold Socrates

The following fine-crafted selection of kush cuts came into fruition through a comment from our top bredren, kinfolk, comrade and all around bad-ass the All Mi-T Torrance Stephens. On this years’ falling of the April 20th (4/20) all-day THC gorge-fest, we scoured through our bloodshot, max-toked haze - fully blunted out of our gourds, to post something worthwhile for you stoned souls running rampant through the Web.
Now with our cerebrals fully soaked in Sensi, stepping in like a true soldier, the beastoid post crusher Los Diablo was able to compile a well-diversed selection of tunes to enjoy while evoking upliftment. Although we did a well above the norm job here the lack of Playa Fly's "Luv Da Hay" disappointed RawDawg so we've been plotting a proper addition to that post to incorporate that track with a few other cannabanoid encrusted joints to let our folk know we always come through. Here it is...


















Posted by Rico "Packin plenty iszm"

DOPEBOY MUSIK

It turns out that Rap music isn't dead as I previously had thought, rather just slightly comatose. Rico was doing some inspecting on the net and found these hidden dartz. Rico put me down onto the game, so I therefor must bestow those same blessings upon the almighty nation of Pimpin Pens. All of these tunes are guaranteed to get you crunk, buck, and jookin out the mainframe. So get throwed and enjoy these assorted 2008 blends of fire.

Triple J feat. Lil Boosie-You Know Its Me


3 Deep-My Thug feat. LiL Handy (RIP)


All Star Feat. Young Buck-Tear It Up


Big Pokey feat. Slim Thugg-Boss Hogg On Candy


Big Tuck feat. Fat B-Not a Stain On Me


Big Wu feat. Fabo (of D4L)- Um da Shit


Prozak- 24's Shinin


Enzo! You Know Its Me!

St. Ides Commericals

St.Ides put on one shrewd marketing campaign when they got rappers to spit verses about drinking St. Ides on commercials. Their operating margins (profits) must have increased tenfold during the implementation of this tactic. Check out these underground gems. St. Ides tasted like dick though (Not that I know what dick actually tastes like) Whatever just watch the mafucking videos foolios.

Wu Tang minus Rza and U-God's verses


This ought to take care of that


Biggie


Two of Amerikas Most Wanted-2pac & Snoop


Gheto Boys & Ice Cube


Dr. Dre


Ice Cube


DJ Pooh


DJ Pooh & King Tee


MC Eiht


Cypress Hill


Method Man & Redman


Enzo on the Post & Walking the Beat

Mo Non-Rap Flavor-Headbangers Ballin

I used to hate those hip hop hipster elitists who were always ranting and raving about hip hop being dead, but now I am beginning to echo their sentiments. I attribute this new found onset of hip hop apathy to the fact that all of my favorite rap artists have degenerated into shells of their former selves. Wu Tang came out with their first album in like 7 years, and I couldn't even get into it because Ghostface and Raekwon were talking shit about it before it even came out in stores; thereby completely deadening my anticipation leading up to its release. On top of that, you've got my other former favorite rap group Three Six Mafia now dwindled down to a mere duo-formerly a sextet (group consisting of 6 members) performing songs with the likes of Justin Timberlake, T-Pain, Paris Hilton, Bow Wow, and Good Charlotte. I have no animosity for these "pop" artists, however I must say that I don't think it is necessarily a good fit for them to be collaborating with Three Six Mafia (the old 36 that is), the new 36 seems to embrace this idea of Hollywood, with all of its material trappings and false idolatry. In that sense they are a perfect marriage of pop stars, which enables them to make more cheese. I can't hate, but I won't be bamboozled into thinking that 36 still represents to the extent that they did in the When The Smoke Clears 6661 days. Hollywood is fraught with fakeness and bitchmadeness and I think that the Triple Six have become corrupted by its glorification of these ideals. Maybe I'm getting a little too fire and brimstonish here, but I'm deeply saddened by these unfortunate turn of events. A part of me wishes that it was still 1998 where the Wu Tang and the Triple Six were both still in their prime making nothing but gangsta shit for lack of a better term. However, I know that it is selfish for me to think that these groups can both restore back the feeling of mid 90's gangsta rap. After all they both put in enough dirt in the rap game to have the luxury of resting on their laurels. I just wish I could see the old triple six in all their former glory and splendor turn it out on a reunion tour and album, but that won't happen. If they only knew how much money everybody could make if they did another Prophet Posse album produced by Paul and Juice. I rescind that comment, I'm not so sure if a Prophet Posse album produced by Paul and Juice would be as dope as I previously thought. I've noticed that not only has Paul and Juice sold out but they are no longer capable of producing truly gangster evil music anymore. All their shit now is like booty shakin junts and club anthems, no more hardcore shit. I think the whole change in musical content came when they won the Academy Award, that's when their production took a turn for the worse I'm afraid. But I guess they kept it as gutter as long as they possibly could until they couldn't take it anymore and were forced to defect to the dark side of the force. There is only a handful of rappers that I can rely on now to bring that pure uncut funk that is so wonderfully encapsulated by people like T-Rock, Mr. Sche, and Lord Infamous. I can go on for days naming people in the rap game who still have potential to turn it out like the days of yesteryear, but for some reason the aforementioned names are the first to come into mind and are like the holy trinity, or last of the jedi knights if you will- maybe that's because these dudes were one of the only ones who kept it real from jump street with us. Regardless, I'm now in anti-rap mode bumping some of the shit that I used to listen to as a little jit. I present you with some more trill shit from the other side of the tracks. I have no agenda with these non-rap bangers, only that they just appear in my head out of nowhere and I'm obligated to put it down for the nation and to school the unschooled in that triple og shit. I will try my hardest to encompass all types of genres spanning the entire musical spectrum, so as to be as impartial and eclectic as possible. The following diddy is the Heavy Metal group Metallica-interestingly enough, back in the day before they "sold out" their damn selves. It is of the utmost importance that we acquaint ourselves with music that is transcendant in its appeal. Check it!



Enzo on the post

RZA as Bobby Digital "You Can't Stop Me Now" Full Video

Here it is, this shit is epic to say the least, lol. Peep the RIP ODB shirt, RZA on a throne, the Wu symbol and the Bobby Digital mask in the sky - this video has it all! The ever prolific Wu-Tang frontman is back with a cinematic masterpiece for all the Digi heads out there.

Posted by Rico for Pimpin' Pens

Tribute To A Smash Brother: Mu IS Missed

Over this memorial day weekend, Pimpin' Pens received word that a truly magnificent emcee/producer, Camu Tao, lost his battle to cancer on May 25th, 2008. Our best goes out to his fam and friends and we will do everything in our power to retain and spread his legacy of musical contributions.

Mu was beyond a gifted and talented musician, he was perceived by many as just an all around incredible person. Having had the chance of meeting him at a show once, I could tell from the jump he was a genuine artist in everything he represented and not some chump putting up a facade for the crowd. His stage presence live, wild, entertainment above any "rap act" as he would occasionally smash guitars and bottles during performances. We're talking rap here folks, that's hard as fuck! His rhyming style was on a level of it's own ever since his origins with the classic Ohio based underground group, "The MHz(Megahertz)". His cadence was so unique you could never confuse him for anyone else lacing the track. A rare gift this day and age with all the hip hop cloning experiments taking place. He produced a catalog of dusty horned out, power bass riffed bangers for colossal artists such as Cage, El-P, and Aesop Rock, just to name a few. He, along with partner Metro formed the group "SA Smash" pioneering yet another sub-genre of hardcore underground music. The industry, movement, culture, and fans as a whole will truly miss such an inspiring, hilarious, and hard boiled character for years to come.

Peep These Ridiculous Bangers From Camu Tao:







To learn more about this legend to independent music and/or to purchase his timeless works, please visit: The Def Jux Pharmacy

Posted By Los for Pimpin' Pens

RZA as Bobby Digital "You Can't Stop Me Now"

From the devious, dusted-out mind of the Rza, once again transformed into alter-ego Bobby Digital comes the new official trailer for "You Can't Stop Me Now" . His new album "Digi Snacks" is dropping June 24th on Koch Records. Keep an eye towards the sky, Wu-tang is back and Killa Bees are on a swarm. Check back as we bring you the latest on this album and other side projects from the Clan.

BONUS: The RZA - A DAY TO GOD IS 1,000 YEARS

Posted by Rico "Mesc tabs in my skull" for Pimpin' Pens

No Limit One Mo Gen: Youngbleed On Deck

Its time to hit you up with some more southern classics straight out the boot. The boot being Baton Rouge, Louisiana of course, and who else could rep the boot more tighter than the boot's own child of the ghetto, Youngbleed. Youngbleed is one cold brother on the mic tip, with that smooth laid back flow like water. He kind of puts you in a trance when you listen to him. I have to admit that I wasn't always so hip to the music of Youngbleed. In fact it wasn't until about 3 years ago that my boy played me the classic album My Balls & My Word. What better way to introduce a Youngbleed newcomer than with the most hardbody junt on that album, the uber gangsta cut entitled; The Day They Made Me Boss. Upon listening I was immediately converted into a Youngbleed disciple, and vowed to preach the good word of Bleed to the unenlightened masses. Enjoy some of these more noteworthy cuts from Bleed.













and last but not least, the buckest shit ever!


Enzo stays full of dat weed

WE BOUT TO PULL SUM KICKDOES!

What you know about that Corey Miller, and Chad Butler pulling kickdoes. You could say that these two were the last of the Mohican's. Now all we got in the game are a bunch of mark ass bustas, if I do say so myself. I felt the late great Pimp C talk to me through the grave last night and he said: "Enzo, post that Pimp C dedication song by C-Murder."
Who am I not to comply with such a simple request? I got a little No-Limit fever just now and I had to get some shit out my system and on to the Pimpin Pens media canvas. Just a few darts that I've been meaning to throw your way.







This was just a stream of consciousness post, another assorted array of bumpin junts, with a twist of No Limit funk. I got some more No Limit infused medleys on the way. Stay tuned for Mr. Serve On, Fiend, Mystikal, Tru, Silk the SHocker, Youngbleed, Steady Mobbin, Mac, and mo.
Posts by Enzo

Hardest Toon Ever! Big Brock In Full Effect

This fellow bestoid right here needs no introduction, but fuck it lets do it anyway. Carrying such aliases as "Walking Swedish Murder Machine", "Super Kill-Guy", "Franken-Mullet", "Murderist Extraordinaire", "Frankenstein", and "Brock fuckin' Samson", he most notably may be referred to as "your worst fucking nightmare" under the guise Brock Samson. (Was that too repetitive? Good, blow me!) All the monikers basically point towards the same notion: when this dude enters a scene all shit has split the fan. And I don't blame em, as the infamous bodyguard for Dr. Venture in the raw animated series The Venture Brothers on Adult Swim, this class act holds a level 8 class A license to kill! No really dipshit, he does: And is critically acclaimed for such malevolent maneuvers such as accidentally killing his deaf college quarterback, slaughtering 10 foot gators, skinning polar bears to keep warm, dicking down secret agent broads, only slightly losing consciousness while being bombarded by a barrage of bullets, and nearly dying dozens of times only to reawaken harder than ever to practically pulverize everything in sight. He is also known to be quite thorough in ensuring that a threat is completely eliminated. On at least one occasion, he urinated on what appeared to be a mummy's corpse, in the belief that defiling it would prevent any subsequent reanimation. Additionally, he can be briefly seen through the eyes of another character killing two men by pinning them to the wall with a running lawnmower. A monster mack maniac to say the least. So in light of the brand spanking new Venture Brothers season dropping next month, here is a slick lil montage of my dude Brock holding it down:



Venture Bros Season 3...Coming Coming Atcha!

Posted By Los Venture for Pimpin' Pens

Monsterdon Vandals: The Graffiti Exchange

Who said paint peddlers couldn't be civil? From the radical depths of urbania's rotten core, some of graffs elite have come together under a collective project to further spread the art of concrete manipulation through an exchange worthy of the utmost aerosol fame. Basically, 12 infamous extraordinaire graff hustlers started an exchange back in 2005 whereby they split into 6 pairs of dynamic filth faders and swapped styles and concepts to forever burn dusty walls and trains across the US and Europe.

Renown heavy hitters such as Rime, Revok, Sever, Bates, Search, and Yes 2, just to name a few, flipped magnificent fills and nasty colors to pioneer even more versatility within the world of burners. Give your pupils a teaser and visit the following site:
Peep This Shit For More!

Massive Large Ups to My Man Deems for the Info

Posted By Los Diablo for Pimpin' Pens

Dude Who KO'D Suge Knight on Camera

Who would of thought that the cat who KO'd Suge isn't a gang-banging, boogey man tough guy, rather an unassuming and mild-mannered barber. Well, anybody that lays the smackdown on Suge is a reputable and stand-up bloke in my book. However there seems to be a lot of chattering and gossip mongering among the community that homie is gay, what with all of his limp-wrist gesticulations and what not. Bottom line is the "knockout kid"-which is what they are now referring to him as on the streets is representing self to the fullest. He's also going to get paid in full for his little exposé on the juicy details of his skirmish with Suge.
Check it

Pimpin Pens Fashion Corner: Marvel Teams Up With New Era For Fitted Caps

In an unprecedented move New Era, the market leader in fitted baseball caps made an announcement stating that it obtained an exclusive license to design fitted hats with the logos from characters of the Marvel comic book series. Referred to as the "Super Heroes" collection, New Era is already rolling out the first line of hats inspired by the blockbuster behemoth's Ironman, and Incredible Hulk.
This should be a fresh, and interesting twist on an old favorite. You better believe these things are gonna go over like gangbusters when they drop.

Enzo on the Post

Beastie Boy's MCA In the Directors Chair

One-third of the old school hip hop super group the Beastie Boy's, Adam Yauch, aka MCA recently premiered his independently filmed streetball documentary Gunnin for That #1 Spot at the Tribeca Film Festival in New York. Slated for a June 27th release in movie theaters, the film follows the lives of 8 young up and coming basketball players vying for a chance to play with the big boys. The film takes a candid look at the players during their formative years in High School. It looks like this is going to be the '08 version of Hoop Dreams; the epic documentary covering the lives of highly touted basketball prospects William Gates and Arthur Agee. That was an excellently executed film, and in my mind, sets the benchmark for basketball documentaries. But if anyone can turn it out properly, its the legendary MCA. Enjoy the flurry of bball laced media content below. We got the Beastie Boys, and some Wu Tang All Stars in this biznitch.

Beastie Boys-Pass The Mic


Beastie Boys-Hey Ladies


Beastie Boys-Shake Your Rump


Wu Tang All Stars-Soul in The Hole


Enzo on the Post
Pass Me The Pill An I'll Slam DUnk it Like Shaquile O'Neal

Mo Funny Thangs

I can't help but post these loony videos for your viewing pleasure. If any of you people identify with the same brand of off the wall humour and hijinx as I do, then you will no doubt be spellbound by this wierdo shit right hea. Check out Twiggy the Watersking Squirrel, and his homie the lightsaber wielding chipmunk. The force is strong with that one. I wish I could come up with more poignant and socially relevant material, but this will have to do for the time being.

Twiggy the Water Skiing Squirrel

Teaser_viralvideo_Darthmatic Chipmunk

Enzo Funny Style

New Bangers for the Brizzle

As always, without fair warning, Pimpin' Pendulum shifters drops some saran-wrap fresh new bangers for you fiendos. Nice new joints courtesy of them hard splitters at hiphopsite.com provided at the most opportune time, yet in an oh so unannounced fashion for the beginning of the week. Enjoy!

Reks feat. Termanology & Krumbsnatcha: "Big Dreamers"



Hi Tek feat. Push Montana: "Kill You"



Yak Ballz: "Spy On You"

Yo that beat is fire!

Posted By Los Diablo for Pimpin' Pens

Random Funny Shit Segment: Little Jits Getting Served Real Proper Like

I was messing around on the internet doing my usual rounds at sohh.com, xxlmag.com, and allhiphop.com when I stumbled upon some dude at allhiphop.com who's avatar was a video of some kid getting kicked in the noodle by a break dancer. I did some searching to find some more info about any videos with little kids getting kicked in the wig by break dancers. So I go to you tube and type "little kid gets kicked by break dancer," and what do you know, the results were conclusive, there was a gang of duplicated videos of the little jit getting served. The shit had me chuckling like a fool. Check it!



Enzo

Suge Gets Bodied

Looks like Suge got a dose of his own medicine when he demanded his fetti (cheese, money) from some random dude at the nightclub Shag. Things started to escalate and Suge and his droogs (homeboys) layed the smackdown on the unknown club patron. Things were seemingly in control--Suge and his posse whoops somebodies ass, and that's that, business as usual--that's when shit took an unexpected turn. Homeboy, who everybody thought was down and out for the count, came back up with a fury like Brad Pitt in the movie Snatch and straight up laced Suge with the infamous one-hitta quitta uppercut. Suge got knocked the fuck out for around three minutes and was escorted home by his defamed entourage. Sure looks like big Suge finally got his comeuppance for all the dirt he's done in his lifetime. This isn't 1995 anymore and P. Diddy unfortunately is the new Suge Knight (yeah, I said it). It's ironic how these things pan out. One minute Suge and his goon squad are on top of the world, instilling fear and trepidation on any who cross their bloody warpath, the next minute P. Diddy has assumed the position of Don Dadah. Diddy is notorious for his bouts of rage and furious anger, leading to champagne bottles to unsuspecting domes, as well as a gang of hardbody bodyguards ready to thrash a knicca quick fast upon orders. Those bodyguards will give you a buck 50 for a piece of cheesecake if Diddy is so inclined. It's like some other alternate parallel universe where Diddy is Suge and Suge is Diddy. It's a topsy turvy world we live in I guess. I hope Suge doesn't read this and send some of his goons over my way. If he does let it be known that I'm handy like Lil Handy (RIP) with that toolery. I stay strapped and trained in the mystic art of nin-jitsu at all times. Aint nobody touching me! You've been forewarned.

Check the pics courtesy of TMZ







Three Six Mafia-One Hitta Quitta



ENzOw in The mix

Stranger Than Fiction, Yet On The Really Real: Oddities and Occurrences From Around The Way

Quite possibly one of the grandest perks about hovering through such diverse social circles and constantly making contact with eccentric individuals would have to be the occasional random stories that filter through the rotten grapevines during moments of inebriation. My personal favorites always seem to bulldoze through my subconscious' politically correct barricades and present themselves rather inappropriately, to which my reply would kindly be, "what the fuck, that shit was hilarious while that junt was being passed around yesterday...am I right?", roughly paving the way for a couple insecure bitches to take advantage of this douche bag laughing at such appalling stories, (bonus for me, yes!). So in light of these mild mannered remarks and asshole appearances, Pimpin' Pens would like to share a bit of current events circulating around the brew cooler this past week.

Men charged after skull dug up, used as bong
9th May 2008, 9:15 WST

Authorities in Texas have filed corpse-abuse charges against two men who allegedly removed a skull from a grave and used it as a bong.
The Harris County District Attorney's Office confirmed today that misdemeanor abuse of corpse charges have been filed in the case.
One of the men allegedly told police they dug up a grave in an abandoned cemetery in the woods, removed a head from a body and smoked marijuana using the skull as a bong. Police found the cemetery and a grave that had been disturbed but are still investigating the rest of the story, officials said.
HOUSTON

Not one to frolic over tampering with the deceased or engage in any erotic thought processes over necrophilia, naturally at first glance this would initiate disgust, but fuck if I know maybe these kids couldn't find an apple. What really had me bugging out is when I started pondering on how the fuck did they get caught, and the priceless look on dude's face piece when he got called out taking a nasty rip from some dead kid's skull, lol!


Graveyard Spliffs

Looking for that deadman's kush I suppose.

Leaping dolphins collide; one dies
30-year-old Sharky dies after accident at Discovery Cove lagoon
updated 11:24 a.m. ET, Tues., April. 29, 2008

ORLANDO, Fla. - A dolphin died over the weekend at a SeaWorld sister park after colliding with another dolphin during a guest interaction program.
About 32 visitors were in the lagoon Saturday afternoon when the two dolphins swam into the deeper center and lept from the water, Discovery Cove spokeswoman Becca Bides said Monday.
They collided and Sharky, a 30-year-old dolphin, died, she said. The other dolphin appears to be uninjured but is being monitored.

Condolences to the little fella, but something like this was bound to happen. I mean, super aerodynamic jets crash during airshows from time to time. The real question is, accident or not? Conspiracy theorist have raised some interesting theories regarding the motives of the surviving dolphin. Perhaps a vendetta against old Sharky, or even plain envy towards the name Sharky, or maybe Sharky grew extremly tired of never being able to live up to the name forcing an overdose on bull shark testosterone right before the stunt, who knows. Some say a penguin holding a sniper rifle by the arctic cove might be at large. Times can get rough when sardines go sour nah mean.

Flipper's Fatal High Flying Fiasco


MSNBC News Services
updated 8:24 p.m. ET, Fri., April. 25, 2008

SOLANA BEACH, Calif. - It was a perfect spring morning for an ocean swim.

With the sun shining in a clear blue sky, Dave Martin and his triathlon training group swam past the surfers at Tide Beach on their regular Friday course through cool glassy waters about 150 yards out.

Somewhere below, a shark — presumed to be a great white — was lurking, possibly on the hurt for a seal or sea lion. It struck around 7 a.m., charging at Martin from below and lifting him vertically out of the water, both legs in its jaws, its serrated teeth slicing deep, fatal gashes.
"They saw him come up out of the water, scream 'shark,' flail his arms and go back under," said Rob Hill, a member of the Triathlon Club of San Diego, who was running along the beach when the attack happened.
Martin, 66, was rescued by two swimmers who had been 20 yards ahead. They raced back and dragged him to shore in a little cove shielded by 50-foot bluffs. A lifeguard truck took Martin up to a lifeguard station on the bluff where he was pronounced dead at 7:49 a.m.

I clearly remember talking to one of the flyest bar tenders I have ever laid my perverted eyes on when my buddy so perfectly interjected and asked if any of us had heard what happened to some triathlete out in Cali. Needless to say I settled for just staring at the bartender's tits for the remainder of the time as she was clearly turned off to my chuckle at the outcome of the story.

Wrong Place Wrong Time


Posted By Los "and what" for Pimpin' Pens

CEO Spotlight: Reginald Simmons aka Reggie "Streetwise"

Pimpin' Pens proudly presents a brand new segment to the slue of certified trillness we serve up daily - The CEO Spotlight. Reginald Simmons aka Reggie "Streetwise" is a major figure in the game right now. This certified Boss Hogg is an Author, Director, Producer,and Inventor with deep rooted ties to some of the biggest names and urban icons in the game. With his uncanny ability to capture footage like no other filmmaker, provide exclusive, raw video content, produce special events and majestically maintain the balance between successful Business Man, Entrepreneur and Street Wise Socialite.

Reggie began working on his first DVD project back in 2003 with a local Bay Area production company owned by "The Pharoa". After beginning the project and seeing the huge support he'd received from top names in the Bay , the visionary promptly decided to take advantage of this newly conquered media by rapidly creating and developing these innovative, Street Wise concepts. A long time friend and urban legend Charles "C-Note" Robinson teamed up with Simmons and established the now infamous
ALL GAME ENTERTAINMENT.

All Game Entertainment's success is the ability "To take cameras where no other cameras can go..."! With C-Notes entertainment experience and Reginald's creative ability they are able to produce material that others can't, mainly, because people in the urban world know the duo and trust them to bring quality,raw and uncut material to the forefront of the mainstream.

Reggie "Streetwise" Simmons:

DVD's and MOVIES
The Art of Game (writer, producer)
The Masters Players Balls series (creator, producer and director)
Thong Boxing (creator, producer and director)
Will the real pimps and ho's please stand up (associate producer)
American Prostitute (creator, writer, producer and director)
HOE HUDDLE (producer, director)
BRS: Boogaloo, Robot and Struttin' (producer)

BOOKS
"HOW TO FOR SQUARES" book series (creator, author and producer)
"HOW TO BE STREETWISE" (author)
Judicial Cross (author)

INVENTOR
Streetwise Alert (creator) Streetwise IQ TEST (creator)

Pimpin' Pens is honored to be affiliated with the All Game Entertainment and StreetWise I.T. Team. Stay tuned as we bring you all-new, harder material like the Masters Players Ball 2 dropping next month, Thong Boxing, American Prostitute, epic interviews to get the name out and turn the game out!

To wrap things up, in true trill pimp fashion we lace the post with Space-age pimp tunes to add that extra dimension of realism that separates us from the lame and mundane.

PIMP-C (RIP) - BOBBY & WHITNEY feat.8BALL,MJG



THIS ONE IS FOR THE REAL O.G.'s
Curtis Mayfield - "Little Child"



What you know about that there? - I know you feel me Jones.



Posted by Rico "Yo Gotta Be Down Ho!" for Pimpin' Pens

The NBA Playoffs Baby! There Can Only Be One Though

In light of this years ridiculous, fuck it let me rephrase that, ridiculoid* NBA playoffs, the Pimpin' Pens scouting squadron did a little bit of digging to deliver some of the most recent high flying maneuvers, ultra suave assists, humiliating rejections, and monstrous jams that have occurred during 2008's road to the championship. In no specific order we bring you top highlight reels jam packed with replay value, fill up that pimp cup and enjoy!

Nasty!



King James, Oh So Crazy!


The Fucking N.O. Hornets, the Boot Holding It Down!



Count It!


Celtics vs Lakers? It Just Might Happen


Bonus * Bonus * Bonus! Miami Heat Dancers Photoshoot!

Damn I kicked it with a couple of these ckicklings before they joined the team...

*Ridiculoid: Same as ridiculous but even more bonkers, outlandish, straight fucking nuts! You dipshits...

Posted By Los "trow me de rock" for Pimpin' Pens

Where's The Rapper?

I'm encouraging more participation from you foolios with fun and interactive games like these. Your objective is to spot the rapper who hadn't made it onto the scene at the time of the filming of the video in question. The first people who spot the rapper get a free trip for two on the Galapagos Islands. I'm just playing, you don't get shit, except props from the PimpinPens Clan.

Big Tymers-Big Ballin


Method Man Feat. D'Angelo-Break ups 2 Make ups


Youngbloodz feat. Jim Crow & Outkast-85


Outkast-Benz or Beamer


Goodie Mobb-Cell Therapy


I was kind of cheating on this last one but dude wasn't really on the scene mean like that. However him and his partner already had released like two albums by this time.
This ought to keep you cats busy for a minute.

Enzoe's in it representing it

8Ball & E.D.I. Feat. MJG - Puttin In WorkBallin' on you Ho's!

Spage Age May is in full swing, all you lame, 4-corner flaugers* can get the fuck from round this page! With the new album dropping on 404 music group "This Might Be the Day" MJG is back bucking out the gate to bring back the Pimp Tight MJ of old. With the whole BadBoy thing far behind him now the Rapper/Producer has recently been featured on mostly a variety of underground projects, returning to his roots and more hardcore, Memphis Gangster style like: "Whats your favorite color" with Da Volunteers and "Aight Nah" feat. Mac E from the Montana Trax album.

One of the most influential and flavorful emcees out of the Memphis Scene - MJG has been gutter from the jump with "Comin' Out Hard" and it's MJG’s second solo album since his 1999 solo debut, No More Glory. The Memphis movement stands strong in the Orange Mound Demigod, real fans rejoice in the return of a rapper whose struggled and hustled through the game, always remaining true to his Pimp Tight roots of the M-Town. Stay tuned for more from the mighty MJG!

BONUS JUNT:

Young Buck ft 8ball MJG & Bun B - Say it to my face


And of course we had to hit you with....
Eightball & MJG - Pimp in my own rhyme




*Flaugin and Flaugers - Blatantly faking or perpetrating to the maximum.


Posted By Rico "Don't Make Me Pull Ya Ho Card!" for Pimpin' Pens

The Masters Players Ball

Brand New to YouTube! Behold the exclusive trailer from the first Masters Players Ball Courtesy of the gracious homies at AllGame Entertainment and Streetwise I.T. As usual Pimpin' Pens comes through with the hard to get,authentic to life, content you cant find anywhere else. Catch rare, behind the scenes footage revealing an unparalleled look at how the Games Greatest Names suit up and boot up in their finest, plush attire in an majestic effort to take home the crown.

All Game Entertainment is proud of the support it gets for the Bay Area which propelled "The Art of Game" to the number one urban dvd in 2005 with more than 115,000 sales in the Bay Area alone. All Game Entertainment's success in the Masters Players Balls 1&2 celebrity participation was like no other. Noboday has been able to bring "King Rome, Max Julian,Bishop Don Juan,Filmore Slim, Ice-T, Big Daddy Kane and Dolemite" to one event and on to one stage....and the diversity shown by the latin participation in MPB#2....not to mention a wild appearance by Steve-O from Jack Ass!

VIEW THE TRAILER FOR THE MASTERS PLAYERS BALL 2

ORDER DVDs, Books and More!


***** PIMPIN' PENS EXCLUSIVE: The Masters Players Ball 2008 coming soon in Texas or Atlanta - Stay Tuned for More Info!*****

Reviews on more All Game Entertainment and Streetwise I.T. DVDs and Books coming soon!

Posted By the Masterful Rico "We Hea Now" for Pimpin' Pens

PIMP ART: New Mr. Sche Poster DesignBy Pimpin' Pens

Click The Image Above To View Full Size.
-----DOWNLOAD THAT MOFO------

MAKE IT THE HARDEST DESKTOP WALLPAPER EVER!

Check out the new monster-banger, promo poster for the highly anticipated Undaground Forever Project coming out later this year. The motivation behind the piece was the music Big Sche's blessed us with over the years. The dark, gritty, raw style of a Mack with all out ferocity blended with some pimp flare and finesse. More exclusive custom design work coming soon.

Feel free to contact us if you want some custom graphics, artwork, or any other multimedia need professionally executed with Pimp flavor.



Poster Design By Rico "Never Cheesin' always Flexin'" for Pimpin' Pens

Poppin Off Proper: Space Age Artist of The Month

Might as well continue kicking off this maniacal month of May with a sweet vid from your favorite M-Town Tenekee clique, 8Ball and MJG. While MJG preps his newest solo release for pimp strong listeners everywhere, us here at the paramount Pimpin' Pens headquarters are hard at work prepping a flavorful assortment of classic material from the space age monster for your personal enjoyment.


8Ball & MJG: "Stand Up"



Posted By Los for Pimpin' Pens

Whats Your Street Wise IQ? Take The Test Now!

Take The STREETWISE IQ TEST

In the constant evolution and development of our crafts, game, trades, skills, forte' and what have you the Pimpin' Pens team presents its latest collabo with StreetWise I.T. the official resource for urban information and technology. Creators of the infamous STREETWISE ALERT, The STREETWISE IQ TEST, and STREETWISETV, the founders set forth a movement to provide an authentic collection of materials for streetwise entertainment, protection,and enlightenment. In every city, every block, every trap, every hood it's a known fact that the streets devour the weak and only the strong survive. With the recent increase of frauds, hustles, scams, and crimes against children and the elderly,these cats provide trill content from the perspective of some true, experienced, street savvy, wise O.G.'s in the game who've mastered the art. Sharpen your swagger, solidify your hustle and let this pimp game permeate your mental.


Take The STREETWISE IQ TEST

Official Website of StreetWise Information & Technology
StreetWise I.T.'s YouTube Page

Posted by Rico "Nann Blogger like me!" for Pimpin' Pens

Movie Reviews: SUPER HIGH ME 4:20 24/7 for 30 Days!

The High Times 2006 Stoner of the year, #2 Pot Comic known to the civilized world and self proclaimed weed aficionado, Mr. Doug Benson truly breaks ground with the documentary "Super High Me" a clever play off of Morgan Spurlock's Super Size me. With the whole concept of doing what Morgan did with McDonald's, eating to the extreme for 30 days, Doug sought out to do the same but with monster-doses of high-grade weed non-stop in an attempt at hospitalization or to die and "go out Bear Man style." (That's fucked up lol ) This was just a part of his act until one night some filmmakers caught his show and decided to materialize the idea into a movie.

You know that movie Super Size Me, where that guy Morgan Spurlock ate McDonald’s every meal for 30 days? People actually paid money to see that. Well, if that’s a movie, I’ve got a movie! I’m going to smoke pot every day for 30 days, and it’s going to be called Super High Me, or Business As Usual… I haven’t decided on a title yet. But guess what? McDonald’s is going to be in my movie too!

– Joke from Doug Benson’s stand up act, 2006


Hell, if people paid to see this guy eat greasy-ass, carcinogen-laced, artery clogging,toxic high-calorie McDonald's crap for 30 days puking up and shit you know with millions of cannabis supporters in the U.S. alone (300 million worldwide)there will be quite the audience for this film.

The first half of the movie is Doug's 30 day detox before the 30 day all out chief-fest. He performs a series of test "sober" to compare them later with the results of his bloody-eyed, chronic smoke consumed state. Some test include the S.A.T, a Sperm count, memory, psychic ability and lung capacity to name a few. Eager to "get to the action" so to speak the first half does drag on a bit for my taste but shit I guess they had to put something in their to contrast from the maximum debauchery.I don't want to spoil the flick but some of the highlights of crude sober living include touring with fellow comedians Sarah Silverman, Bob Odenkirk, Patton Oswalt, Jeffrey Ross and others,para sailing over Lake Tahoe and a visit to Vancouver to chill with Marc Emery, Canada's Prince of Pot. This guy is nuts, I've heard about him before being a High Times subscriber and NORML member myself but this movie brought him to another level. The Canadian cannabis and libertarian activist goes on to epically rant of his journey from Seed seller,running for mayor, prison time and how he does everything better "on weed man!" Keep in mind Doug is still sober at this point as Emery stumbles from tangent to tangent,rambling like a village elder blazing out of a massive 3 foot bong like a Shaman. Another funny scene is Patton Oswalt ingeniously improving the idea that Benson has a "THC gland." He goes on to describe that it acts similar to a Camels hump and slowly spurts out doses of pot throughout those first 30 days of sobriety basically keeping the comedian high as shit the entire time. lol

To kick of the Ganja Gorging, 30-day glory to the Gluttons Doug visits a Dispensary* (Medical Weed Pharmacy)where he concocts a monster head-stash of phenomenal strains like OG Kush, Sour Diesel, The Purples (Purps),and goodies like Space Cakes, cookies, THC pills and pretty much anything you can think of with weed.(Lotions, sprays, oils, chap stick, etc. )Amidst the toke-a-thon he unexpectedly starts to get a firsthand glimpse of the current state of flawed Medical Marijuana Laws in California, and the battle the dispensary owners face from the DEA and the feds,revealing the real victims in the feud, the patients with crippling conditions who rely on the herbal healing to make life bearable. In one of the most classic lines I've heard in a while,as the Police and DEA raid this one particular Dispensary a protester hilariously shouts "Go bust a Meth Lab you Pussies!" causing the crowd to bust out laughing in unison. The movie is well scored, edited and produced. Benson holds it down coming through with a truly funny performance and uncovers some interesting facts and effects of Marijuana on the body. Now available on DVD check it out and puff some killa for this "organic" piece of cinema.

More on Doug Benson
Official Super High Me Movie Website


Posted by Rico "Business as Usual" for Pimpin' Pens

SLANG LEXICON - MONKEYNUTS

Monkeynuts - [muhng-kee][nuhts] Noun.Slang
Origin - Early recordings of South Memphis, Ten-a-key rap make numerous references to monkeynuts as a hard form of powder cocaine, otherwise known as "crack".


1. Crack
Synonyms - hard, bolos, rocks
DJ Paul from In Da Game of the Mystic Styles album. "I'm in the cut serving these fiziends with them monkeynuts."
Although it is now widely considered an obsolete term in crack rap terminology, I still like to rep it for the sake of posterity.


In Da Game:


Enzo Infamous Me Futuristic Rowdy Bounty Huntah

CHRONICLES OF THE ACID MANE

Just wanted to throw this in the mix if we're going to tackle the topic of acid. I have many fond accounts of my trips into the outer-realm, but I'm going to just leave you with this humorous anecdote. It was actually my first time, and my homeboy's first time experimenting with psychedelics, in particular shrooms. We were 9th graders in high school if my mind serves me correctly, and we got home to my boy's house who we will refer to as Snaggletooth for all intensive purposes. I want to maintain a level of anonymity for my homie, so as not to put him on blast. Anyway, this cat was talking all evening about the shrooms he had at home, and how we were going to plan to consume them the following weekend. However, plans change, and as we got home from Taco Bell we decided to put them in our tacos at around midnight or so. Except me, I ate my taco first because I wasn't about to put that shit on my succulent chalupa or whatever the fuck it was I was eating. So it was Snaggletooth, my boy Perm, and myself sitting there waiting for these bitches to kick in. Perm and I were both talking shit to Snaggle saying that his shrooms sucked and they weren't doing anything, mind you this was about 1o minutes after we ate them. 15 minutes later my boy Snaggle, who is kind of lightweight when it comes to these types of things, was already starting to act weird and wigging out. He was like off in the corner of his room rubbing his eyes muttering incoherent nonsense. Perm and I meanwhile were both telling him he was a fag and that he got ripped off and that these shrooms sucked. Yet, about maybe a couple minutes after Perm and I said this, I started feeling weird my damn self. However, Perm and I were still trying to keep up the charade like we weren't feeling it, when we both knew we were. Yet we tried as hard as we could to keep telling Snaggle how soft and bitchmade he was while maintaining our composure. Finally, we both looked at each other and said: "I think I'm fucked up." The rest of the night and on to the early morning were spent in Snaggles room doing weird shit that I can't even remember fully. Snaggle was rubbing his eyes and then looking up towards the bright ass over-head lighting in his room and told all of us that he kept seeing little Volkswagen Bugs coming towards him from the light after he would rub his eyes real hard. Interestingly enough, I tried it out and I saw Volkswagen Bugs too! I think it was because he planted the idea in my head from the outset, therefore I was already anticipating the flying Volkswagons heading towards me. Perm on the other hand was busy telling ghost stories to scare Snaggle because he was such a pussy. He turned off the lights and pretended he was the devil, talking in a deep raspy devilish intonation. The funniest thing he said, and about the only thing I can fully remember was, "Contrary to popular belief, it is quite cold in hell." He said it with like a devious English accent. I guess it was the type of thing that you had to be there to think it was funny. Another spooky Perm prank was his attempt at trying to play "Bloody Mary," you know that scary seance shit where you invoke the spirit of Bloody Mary by lighting a bunch of candles and yell bloody mary like a hundred times and she appears in the mirror all bloody and scary looking. Well, Perm's version was a bit different. His version consisted of going into Snaggle's closet dressed in just his tighty whiteys and one of Snaggle's mother's fur coats which she kept in his closet for some reason, and yelling bloody mary like a little girl and doing a little crazy dance routine to go along with it. Needless to say I don't recall Bloody Mary gracing us with her presence that night. I also recall us venturing out into the unknown on our way to his older sister, and younger brother's rooms. We called them dimensions. His younger brother's room was the 2nd dimension and his older sister's room was the third dimension which scared us the most for some incomprehensible reason. The 1st dimension was Snaggle's room, as we spent probably a good solid 3 or 4 hours in that motherfucker acting like some pschyopathic lunatics. I think we felt refuge in there, and we were also a bit incapacitated which prevented us from venturing out too far. Also, we didn't want to be heat-ups and have his parents catch us. Keep in mind that we were still little jits at the time. I also recall his older brother coming home to find us in our retarded mind-altered state where he told us, "Yo, come follow me outside." We followed thinking that he was going to show us something real cool, but when we got outside all he had to say was, "look at that tree." When we did we became mesmerized because we thought it was a demon, and then we got scared and wanted to go back inside. What we didn't realize was during our entranced fascination by the demonic qualities of the tree, his older brother had locked us out of the house just to be a dickhead. We later somehow managed to get back inside where we watched cartoons the remainder of the early morning, until we managed to go to sleep at around 5 or 6 in tha morning.


I now leave you with an apt selection from Lil Wyte: "Acid"


Enzo See a Post Break a Post for Pimpin' Pens